Sunday, January 15, 2012

Looks Ain’t Everything

sexy man
“Women trip me out when they sweat a good-looking man.”

That’s what I tweeted after I saw a woman fawn all over this dude who looked pretty decent…actually, he looked hot. From her comment, you could feel the drool escaping from her mouth as she talked about him. She went so far as to extol his praises from the rooftops, and I sighed a sigh that could be heard around the world.

I’ll be the first to say that we all like a good-looking man, and I have lost my mind over them once or twice (baby daddy comes to mind). But I grew up and learned how to keep my composure. Women who sweat a good-looking man look desperate and being desperate is not cute. Plus, they add fuel to that man’s ego because he knows that the world absolutely adores him. Does he need any more fuel to set his ego on fire?

“Becky, sometimes something we think is gold turns out to be fool’s gold,” Rebecca’s father says in my book. In other words, “all that glitters isn’t gold.” When you bypass people who may not be as attractive (but have more to offer) to break your neck for someone hot, you are doing yourself a disservice.

I’m not saying that you can’t be with a good-looking person or help a good-looking person out by supporting him. But this chick who praised this dude for what was probably mediocre work took the cake. Would she have done that if the guy wasn’t as good-looking? That’s the part that gets me.

Okay. Many of you are going to say I’m bitter because of my past experiences with a good-looking man. Honey, I’ve gotten over that. I love a good-looking man and talked about them a lot in previous blog posts (check out my post “Who Would You Do?”). But I know how to look past that to see if that good-looking person has substance. If they don’t, you have to keep it moving. That’s what I want folks to realize: It’s okay to like the package, but if there is nothing in it, you have to focus your energy on something else. 

Anyway, enough of that. Just wanted to share my thoughts. Have a scintillatingly satisfying Sunday, ya’ll. Be a satellite. Circle around something good.


  1. Substance - Yes! But one has to evolve in order to understand the importance of getting to know someone beneath the surface. More women need to start to making a distinction between 'eye candy' and 'relationship potential'. Very true that coming off 'too eager' is not a good look. Some of us have forgotten that we (women) are the prize.

  2. NilaJay, I couldn't have said it better! Thanks for your wise words.

  3. Truth!!! There are so many wonderful men out there that may not be Boris or Shemar or Denzel but they know how to treat a woman, are faithful, hard-workers, just all around great - but some simple-minded women will pass them up for some eye-candy that will use and abuse them.

  4. Great post! I'm glad I am following you by email now...I missed the "who would you do" post. Got to catch up. :-)